What I’m looking for…
The past weekend was a harsh realization that no matter how hard you may try to love and make everything perfect for someone else if they do not have the desire to satisfy your emotional needs then you are existing in a delusional one-sided relationship. At some point you look up and realize the row boat has been going in circles for far to long and you have to just jump alone into the chilly water.
After spending so much time and energy trying to cater to what others wanted I found myself unsure if I had any desires of my own. Now after a crash course in reality I realized what my heart has known all along…
I want this…
Eyes locked with magic in the air. It wasn’t just the phenomenal camera or photographer that makes this my favorite photo, its the way I remember feeling. Absolute bliss and happiness.
I want this…
Inspiration. It had been a few years since I could remember myself smiling so much. Mentally ignited in ways that can not truly be explained this is just a glimmer of the possibility I look forward every day.
I want this…
More time with loved ones. Laughing, dancing, talking about everything under the sun.
I want this…
Attention. Parties. And fun.
Nothing feels as good as making other people happy while a little bit of creativity, tequila, and celebration excitement.
I want this…
Honesty. Having the ability to say things I may not want to hear because you know I need to hear it. Along with not lying because no matter how intelligent you maybe trusting my intuition is far more credible than believing another’s spoken words.
But above all I want this…
A family that is as amazing as mine.
That I could spend the weekend with and would feel as if I had always been a part of their lives. That we could share cooking stories with and even go on a tour the whole time feeling at home.
So universe, :) I understand this maybe asking for a lot but have faith that you will send someone great.
